The Power of Unconditional Love

“Protective factors are conditions or attributes in individuals, families, and communities that promote the health and well-being of children and families.” - ChildWelfare.gov

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Unconditionally loving relationships with children produce these protective factors: attachment and bonding to family, social skills, emotional control, interaction with prosocial peers, and opportunities for prosocial involvement in the family.

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By WHEN member, Judi Swanson, LCSW~R

“The mud will wash off but the memories will last a lifetime.” - Nadia Tayob 

For parents and guardians of children, our relationships with them grow and evolve just like they do. Step by step, word by word, experience by experience we take action to raise our children to become happy, healthy, and resilient adults with whom we have strong bonds. It is challenging because as parents and guardians we want to do what is best for our children, yet we can be unsure at times about what to do.

“Children learn more from what you are, than what you teach.” W.E.B DuBois

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An article in Greater Good Berkeley states, “Starting when children are young, the way we interact with them helps shape how they respond to us and to other people in their lives.” Communication, listening, modeling, and unconditionally loving them make a difference in how they see themselves and the world around them. The same article states, “Letting the children in your life know that they are loved for who they are now and who they will become helps create a trusting relationship, also called a secure attachment. Build your relationship by spending dedicated time with your child doing something they choose, paying attention to their likes and interests.” A child with secure attachments will have higher self-esteem and sense of self, stronger emotional regulation, along with a solid foundation of compassion and empathy. Over the years, multiple studies have come to the same conclusion that one solid, secure, trusting, loving relationship with an adult will have a significant impact in the life of a child.

“If I could give my child three things, it would be the confidence to always know their self-worth, the strength to follow their dreams, and the ability to know how truly, deeply loved they are.” - Unknown

Sometimes in the hustle and bustle of life we forget that the little moments are also powerful moments with children. A dinner of cereal, an argument over school work, or feeling pressured to do chores when your child wants to read a book or watch a movie have a place in our relationships. Life lessons such as compromise, negotiation, strategy, and cooperation are being taught and modeled. For those with teenagers, as prom and graduation approach, listening and talking about being safe and healthy choices have been built on years of prior experiences and conversations. Letting any child or teen in your life know that they are unconditionally loved provides a safety net of security and love they will carry throughout their life. WHEN’s dedication to our mission to raise strong, healthy, and resilient children and teenagers is unwavering. Our website, whendfcc.org, includes support and resources for parents, guardians, and all community members.